just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I will be naked everywhere
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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