i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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