can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Randomize
