soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
