just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
