i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Randomize
