i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
