So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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