You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
