my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
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