I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize