Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I'm sobbing to NWA
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Randomize
