Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
we're so committed to being not committed
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