Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
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