friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
