this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
