Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
