Say something about gay babies.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Randomize
