Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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