I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
