if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
