Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
