Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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