There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
