All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
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