When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
