at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
