i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
