he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
