absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize