you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Randomize
