Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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