I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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