I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
honey bunches of taint.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
