Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
