I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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