Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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