i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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