when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
