"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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