Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Randomize