Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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