Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
