Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
don't judge my taste in strippers
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Randomize
