Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize