Me too!
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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