I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
That accounts for only three of the penises
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
