I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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