ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
