New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Randomize