I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
