Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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